


Running, Running, Fast as We Can

by AceQueenKing



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: First Kiss, M/M, Multi, POV Second Person, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-12-05 07:06:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11572914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceQueenKing/pseuds/AceQueenKing
Summary: James Vega falls for two of his superiors, but it's complicated.





	Running, Running, Fast as We Can

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BardofHeartDive](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BardofHeartDive/gifts).



1\. You think it will be awkward, you, the third of three big-damn heroes, making their duo a trio so late in the game, but it's not.

The universe is contracting and you know it, you _all_ know it. Kaidan looks at you with heavy eyes and you feel Vancouver weighing on him; Shepard looks down and you know he's thinking about Los Angeles, about all the _niños_ he left behind when he went into the alliance. You joke that you three are the three amigos now, the three sides of the North-American Alliance brought to life, and sometimes they laugh, politely. Sometimes they just stare, thinking about who's left on your home continent, and sometimes you just move on as best you can with the time that's left.

2\. The first time you feel something is in Vancouver.

It's not appropriate, not then. Kaidan's a major, Shepard's, well, Shepard's a prisoner. You notice they're both hot, but you feel duty bound not to do anything about it. You're Alliance-First and Alliance-Last and Alliance-Inbetween, and you'd give anything to be a Big Hero like they are. You're not gonna blow it by bangin' a superior, even if the connection between you shimmers and cracks and pops like a god damn firecracker on the fourth of July.

But then, of course, the Apocolypse changes everything. You're running for your life, Kaidan by your side, and Shepard's voice blaring on the comms, and the only thing you're thinking is: you should have done it when you had the chance. Should have grabbed them, kissed them, told them how perfect they were. The chance is gone now, you think; you'll be lucky if at least one of you lives through this. 

"Major!" You point toward the Normandy, and you think, this is the best god damn ship in the universe, you're so happy to see her, and you run toward her, and you pray, and you keep an eyes out for Kaidan, too, because you're not going to be the only survivor if you can help it.

"I see it!" Kaidan says. He shoots his gun, one time, two times; the two mutant things in your way, these husks - fall at your feet. You run over a husk's hand with your boot and you don't care, focusing on getting to the ship on time.

Kaidan shoots you a smile as you make it, and your knees buckle, and you don't quite fall but only because Estaban would never let you live it down, and Kaidan, well, Kaidan shoots you a deep look and you wonder, for the first time, what he sees, and whether or not he likes it.

3\. They say you should never meet your heroes but whoever said that never served with Shepard.

He's a good guy, this hombre; the kind of Pan-American boy who smiles and loves apple pie. It doesn't matter that he was born south of the Rio Grande; that just makes him more interesting. Worse, you're trapped on a ship together, which, despite its five-floors of dura-steel between you, it can somehow feel rather far-too-close. Your connection is becoming even more intense, and what was admiration has turned into a full-scale crush.

"Vega? _¿_ C _omo la estrella?"_ He asks you one day, out of the blue, his Spanish soft and perfect and achingly seductive. You're in the middle of a pull-up but you stop and drop because _Dios mío_ , you are thinking about all the things that mouth could be saying and you don't want to pop a boner on him in the middle of a conversation, even if you know you have nothing to be ashamed of in that department.

"Si, si." You say, then smile. "Porque Shepard? No eras una oveja," you say, and at calling him a sheep, he smiles, because you both know he's not any kind of prey. You look him steadily in the eye, and he looks back, steel-blue eyes on brown, and you don't look away as you say, "Eras un lobo."

"Lobo?" His eyes sparkle and you can tell he likes that. He leans out a hand and touches your shoulder, just a bit, but you both catch the frisson of heat between you. He leans in like he's going to kiss you, but he stops, just at the last second, awkwardly clapping your cheek instead, then leaves you wanting.

4\. It doesn't take long on the Normandy to find out that Shepard and Kaidan are an item. Or were, at least.

It's not hard; everyone is gossiping about it. "Kiss your Canadian Bacon goodbye!" Joker cackles; "I hope they pull through," Tali confides; "They've been through a lot," Liara says, as usual, underscoring everything. Some of the ship is very pro their relationship; some are against. But everyone has a god damn opinion, and almost all of them talk to you about it, even though it's the last thing you want to hear about. They're both perfect, and obviously, that's on your face every time you look at either one of them, because everyone talks to you about their relationship and you just - wish - they wouldn't. Because it's not your relationship, and you don't want to imagine them being unbelievably awesome together while you're watching from the sidelines. Not that you're not gonna cheer them on, no, you're their friend and you love them and you encourage them and all that, but imagining them in love while you're sitting on the sidelines? No thanks.

All of which makes it more shocking when Kaidan comes up to you and tells you to ask Shepard out.

"Ay, Major?" You stare into dark eyes so plainly tortured you feel like you're kicking a puppy. "Thought you and Lobo had a little something-something."

Kaidan laughs long and low. "Long time ago. He needs someone now. Some happiness." He looks away, eyes on a distant shore, sometime long ago. "We made our choices, Lt. And you well, you'd be...you'd be good together."

You want to say you can't, you want to say this is his place, not yours; you want to say you're worth more than Kaidan's sloppy seconds, but then Shepard comes up to you both, black hair slicked back and blue eyes hard as steel, and says, "Hey guys, what's up?" and Kaidan shoves you forward.

"Just talking about what Vega says he wants to do with your mouth," Kaidan says, and you can almost imagine the daggers going into his heart as he says it.

"Is that so?" Shepard's eyes sparkle like diamonds, and they swallow you whole.

5\. Being a Hero's boyfriend ain't easy.

Not that there aren't perks, but you can see why Major and Lobo had some ...issues. Lobo is a lone wolf, goes his own way, and sometimes he leaves the Normandy and sometimes you're not sure he's coming back.

But then he does, and the feeling it gives you to see him, to know he's gone through hell and back, is worth it. Triumphant, adrenaline-fueled kisses in the darkness - worth it. Knowing you're the only thing keeping the savior of the galaxy tethered to normal life? Worth it. The feel of cool-blue eyes at your back when you're on the mission, watching your six and keeping you safe? So, so worth it. It's not perfect, and it hurts as much as it feels good, but you're too much of an adrenaline jockey to care about the growing worries that this might not last forever.

You try not to think too much about the Major. Alenko's been stayin' on the observation deck and you don't think he has any plans to leave it; you understand that. You would do the same.

But it doesn't stop you from feeling guilty every time you kiss Lobo, and wondering if maybe he wants to be kissin' Major instead.  
  
6\. You shouldn't be jealous that Major and Shepard went to dinner together on the Citadel, but you are.

Jealousy's green bite sinks deep; you stare at the fish in Shepard's bedroom, trying to keep calm. You're not the kind of crazy, jealous boyfriend who thinks anyone who looks at your lover is offending you, it's just...couldn't Shep be friends with someone who wasn't his ex?

To keep calm, you study the fish, you give them names. Blinky, Sicily, Fishdog. You go through your examination material for becoming part of the N7 program not once, not twice, but three times. You're just about to lose your damn mind when Shepard walks through the door, Kaidan in tow. Their hands are linked together, and your heart sinks, because you know - you just _know_.

"Hey," you say, quietly. Shepard nods in that steely way he does; the Major swallows, nervous. "Glad you worked things out." You say, and stand up. "No hard feelings. It was a fun ride."

You rush past them because you don't want to have either of them see you cry. You should have known it was inevitable, you think; it takes all your willpower to get to the door, and just as you raise your hand to activate it, Shepard says, "Wait."

"You don't have to explain, hombres. Really." You don't want to hear it; don't want to know that you were just a piece in someone else's game. "I'm fine."

"No, wait," Kaidan says, and you hear the Major's boots coming up behind you and you wince only slightly as he puts a hand on your back. "You've got the wrong idea. We were talking and..." Kaidan sucks in a breath. "We made up, sure. But..."

You hear Shepard coming up behind him and dare to turn around, as those steely blue eyes turn toward yours. "I love Kaidan," he says, and your heart breaks again, and you open your mouth to ask what the hell he's playing at when he presses a finger to your mouth and says, _"Pero_ te amo _, James._ "  _I love you_ wrattles around in your head, obliterating all other thoughts. 

"The hell?" You say because it is all you can say.

"We want to be with you. Together, with you." Kaidan's eye flicker toward yours, then back to Shepard, who nods.

"If you'll have us, _amor_ ," Shepard says.

You take a deep breath, thinking about it, though really, what's to think about? The answer is obvious. You need only reach deep inside and grab your courage to say it - and somehow, you do.

"Of course," you say. "Of course."

Then Shepard kisses you while Kaidan runs a hand low down your back, and your body hums in pleasure, finally feeling complete.

7\. You're running, together.

You're running together, running against time, against the Reapers, against everything. You run and fight and scream together; you eat and cry and fall into bed exhausted, together. It's not perfect, and it hurts as much as it feels good. The nights are long; the days are longer. There's hell over every hill, but strength lies at your side; your lovers who are your brothers in arms keeping you safe. You live and you love and you hurt, but you do it all together.

And even it's not perfect, and it hurts as much as it feels good, James Vega wouldn't face the apocalypse any other way.


End file.
